I am not pretty

Pretty is a 6 year old girl with pigtails and ribbons. I am a 44 year old woman. I am a lawyer. I have travelled round the world. I was making life-changing decisions when you were still having wet dreams. I can renovate a house, change the wheel of a car. I manage a property portfolio. I have delivered a baby. I am a daughter, a sister and an auntie, an advisor and a trainer, a friend. I run marathons. I jump out of planes, dive with sharks and ski down mountains. 
Being called pretty is demeaning. It means that despite all my abilities and achievements I am simply judged by my looks and that is all I am worth to the world. 
What does a woman want? She wants to be complimented on her achievements, her character traits and her personality. Simple as that. Value her for her strengths and abilities never her looks. Men are not complimented on their looks because that’s not important to them, so why should women be?
I know I am being controversial for calling this but that is because society dictates that women should only be concerned by their looks for that defines their worth. I should be flattered by compliments about my looks because it means I have achieved what society says I should set as my only goal. Well done little girl!  
But if I refuse to take that trite, demeaning compliment I am shot down as a bitter, cynical, anti-social old bitch. I am told I should be grateful for the compliment and I am virtually forced to accept it, which makes it even more offensive. That is why I am standing up against it and all the thought processes and perceived acceptances of it. 
I value my achievements and that is what I want to be complimented on. 
I think this goes to the core of feminism. You don’t really know me or understand women if you don’t get that. 

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